Prolonged Agony
Have you ever watched reality TV program/show that showcases elimination day portions at the end of every week?
Then you see the contestants sweating their asses, teary-eyed, mix emotions etc.
Their faces look odd. Mona Lisa would look a bit nicer. Ha-ha.
Heart beats thunder. Like the one’s that killed Mufasa. Ha-ha (Hooves)
Then the mushy portion of it… They cry (Sarcastically) to their so called comrade that serves as the sacrificial lamb (Poor thing).
Though I know some of them really mean the tears they shed. (Yeah, right!)
They (The lucky ones) get to live for the next day. And hopefully, will triumph (Running away with a million dollar/peso prize money).
Being a trainee (Scopist) is no different from that reality TV program/show contestants. We too (I’m assuming that all of us) endures the same pathetic emotions of uncertainty (The only difference is, we won’t gain popularity or movies or runaway with a million. (Just a few thousand PHP…huhu)
We are now at the peak of realizing it’s not a joke or a game (that we are being trained. Ha-ha) because every performance counts (Shit!) and will have a bearing at the end of it. I attest to that. Nerves crack when the final day comes (Evaluation time). I admit it’s never a good feeling, waiting for your judgment/evaluation. I know, I must know.
Your faith will be tested. It’s never an easy thing to do – to maintain your faith when everything didn’t seem to fall at the right place (in your own point of view). It may seem odd for you, but for me, it’s an even matter. (Just trying to have some humor here. Hehe…) I needed this work badly. That’s why I worry a lot. (Damn it! Bcoz of this, I’ve gain more than just a headache, but a pimple as well)
The deliberation/evaluation is yet to come. I myself, like the reality TV program/show contestants have all the reasons to worry especially, if this means the beginning or the end of a wonderful chapter in your life.
It’s not easy to see your dreams/hardships just go by – just like that!
I felt stupid for laughing at those reality TV show/program contestants (The losers) when they say (after being eliminated), “Ginawa ko naman po yung best ko…” Coz now, I feel like saying exactly the same words spoken by those people. Ha-ha.
Oh, well, that is life. I’m just gonna wait and expect for the best, if not, the worst scenario that will unfold.
